Love that grows and grows

"I never knew that a mothers love for her children grows and grows each day, each year etc. and I never knew that it would be so hard to see them grow up.". - Carrie, mom of 2

When I brought my twins home, I was a robot. Feed the babies, get them to sleep, tried to find time for me to sleep, repeat. Day after day. It's hard to say it, but didn't feel that bond, that magic, at first.  I loved them, of course, but maybe I was so busy just trying to keep our heads above water that I wasn't making that connection that "everyone" says they feel.  It did come, at about month three.  There was no grand event, no special occasion; the twins and I were just on the floor and as I was looking at their little faces, something happened.  A wave of awe and amazement, an overwhelming love that I finally recognized was constantly and eternally growing.  I called my girlfriend and sheepishly told her I had something to admit, that I had finally felt the bond to my girls that I had unknowingly been missing. Thankfully, she told me it did not happen right away for her either... something I wish I would have known earlier instead of carrying the guilt that comes with feeling like the only mom in the world missing the baby-bonding-gene.

That was just the beginning.  A wise woman, Carolyn, would always say "I love you more" after my "I love you."  My reply was always, "no you don't."  And then she would smile knowingly and to tell me to wait until I had kids of my own.  She knew then what I've finally learned - a parent's love constantly, infinitely, grows

"Yes, they grow up fast. Do not push it...hang on to it...enjoy it...let it flow over you...and smile as you see them sleeping...so innocent...so precious...rock them a little longer than you need to." - Jeanne, mom of 2

People always say 'it goes by fast, enjoy it'.  I wish I would have known how right they are from the get go. My twins are four and my "baby" will be two next month - where did the time go?  As I've realized how fast it goes,  I do try to hang on tighter, to rock a little longer.  I skip the night out and truly relish just being with them (admittedly, some times more than others).  I love staying home, playing with them and acting like a kid again.  I love watching them.  I love seeing them interact, hearing their laughs and their voices.  I love that they think I can sing and have the best dance moves.  That will not last forever, I know.

And my love for them grows and grows each day. And yes, it goes by fast, and I am going to try to enjoy every single moment.